Saturday, 24 November 2012

Mix and match for work

New leaf

Went through a lot since i last updated this blog.
Decided to take a new turn in my life.

That includes from a so-called an Apple user to becoming a Kimchi user.. ahaks~~ 
me such a traitor muahaha
Dont get me wrong.. the 'kimchi' i'm referring to is a Samsung product.. huhu what makes me change sides?? Because i'm so disappointed with the latest product of Apple.. xde penambahan baru lgsg! Hmph~ stakat laju sket.. n pnjg sket? Pooorah~ pergh statement aku.. marah koloni2 PRO apple..

Neway, starting today i vowed to myself to activate this blog again.. and scream my heart out here everything about myself.. be it my loveless life and my hectic tabib life.. and my interest..and so on and so forth..

Tahniah kpd diri sendiri~  clap2~
Sekian. Wassalam~~

Monday, 23 January 2012


 i thought that would be my last farewell trip. 
i did swear to myself i won't be swayed again by any false ideation of mine.
a delusion.
but why must that embarrassing moment happened?
i believe there must be a strong reason for every turns in our life.
when that thing happened, i kept questioning my decision.
why? why? why?

i have decided.
i must stop imagining things i knew will never come true.
please be decisive and be selfish for once.

i'll be alright.

Wednesday, 9 November 2011

unspoken emotion

unSPOKEN emotion

'i hate this feeling, the one i know too well
it's called heartbreak and it hurts like hell'

Tuesday, 1 November 2011

blodd-shot eyes


dah lama tak tengok mata kat atas nih.. ye lah.. agak seabad jugak la aku meninggalkan dunia anime nih. kalau zaman student dulu tiap2 minggu aku kasi harddisk kat sorg member aku nih sedut suma anime yg dia ade.. termasuk la mata sasuke-sama nih~ huhu 

sekarang mata aku tgh ala2 clan sasuke ni la~ hecceh~
not exactly macam gambar tu la.. tapi ada la sikit2~ huhu nk jugak ade persamaan tuh~
tapi mata aku merah kat keliling mata hitam tu.. 
sebab ape?

aku dapat KERATITIS 2ndary to CONTACT LENS usage~
padan muka sendiri..
sbb terkadang, aku bleh pakai contact lens ni lama2 lebih dr 8jam..
terkadang aku tertido ngan contact lens nih..

mula2 aku igt dah dpt corneal ulcer dah cuak gak kalau kene..
palpitation macam baru lepas pecut 100meter tuh!

So untuk berkongsi pengalaman
kita baca la serba sedikit ape benda lah keratitis or corneal ulcer yang segala bagai tuh..

sbb aku malas nak taip panjang2
boleh la korg baca sendiri kat cni yer...
jgn sampai jadi macam aku~

aku dah jumpa ngan Ophthalmo MO td.
dah di check, she said benda nih masih tak brape serious
kene pakai antibiotics dulu
and appointment Jumaat nih
sehabis baik aku pakai ubat nih walaupon tak sedap langsung!

Dear my left eye~ i bring harm to u.. forgive me..
get well soon~

kene puasa dr contact lens dah.. dah tak payah nak ngada2 cantek2 ngan contact lens lagi.. huhu



Sunday, 30 October 2011

concealing the truth VS telling lies


a friend asked me between those 2 options above, which one do i prefer?
honestly, to me, it's like being thrown a question between being sodomized and being raped which one do you prefer?

both are equally bad.
comparing these two doesn't make any different. 

Imagine yourself in the place of someone whose being told lies or someone who was kept in the dark?
it's horrible, right?

honesty is the best

why is it so hard to tell the truth?
is it in your gene for being a liar? NO, IT IS NOT.
so far being in medical field, i haven't encounter any journal or any research saying such thing as the new discovery of sequence of gene that encoding someone to become a liar~ 

but, telling lies is cancerous, i must say..
when lies got discovered, you kept on telling another lies to cover the first and then 
if the next one was discovered, another one would come to cover the 2nd one.. 
and naturally
 you felt that lying is your second nature to deal with things in life... 
because it's easier to get away with things rather than facing it courageously..

and then
it became bigger and bigger, 
till you reach one moment where you yourself found out that the lies you were telling became more and more absurd
you build a barrier around yourself so that you won't blurt any of those lies

then you want to undo back what has been done
but you don't know how to undo the whole thing.. because you don't know where to start~ 
then you yourself will feel a lot more horrible than those being lied to
you will lose your friend
and the most important thing is
you lost your own good self

what is worst?
when the lies you've been hiding got busted
you lost the trust from the people around you
you got isolated
whatever you said, people will have certain degree of disbelief.. 
and you get a lot of 'cornering look' or suspicious look from those who listened to your words

pretty encouraging environment to live your entire life then, isn't it? (~_~)
try it yourself,then! huhu

that's why i prefer honesty
live a simpler life and be truth to your surroundings and yourself

last word from me:
"the naked truth is always better than the best dressed lie"

Cinta dan Benci

Cinta & Benci

tajuk budget best kan? 
tapi macam agak benar jugak lah dlm situasi yg berlaku skrg ni.

aku tengah bercinta ke sekarang?
bunyi macam sedang bercinta kah?
Errr NO, NO, NO..
kat sini aku just nk cerita kan apa yang aku cinta (suka).. and apa benda yang aku benci..
if dlm rules and regulations tu macam DO's and DONT's la lebih kurang..

dengar music
makan n tido ( ni basic sgt )
teh ais
muslimah fashions (konon2 bergaya lebih2 la)
drive jauh2
sahabat handai
honesty and transparency within friendship

taugeh, bhgn tengah2 timun tuh, tembikai
medical report
perempuan gediks
fake people
the feeling of lonely and isolated
liar (ni plg2 benci) - don't be a hypocrite ok?

pernah tak ada perasaan someone is lying to you?
u know, the feeling when a certain someone is actually trying to explain something that happened but you can sense something fishy.. something like u felt unsettled with those explanation.. i don't know exactly how to describe those kind of feeling, u just can sense it..
it felt like that person is not being totally true to you and there's something concealed behind all those explanation?
tell you what.. 
that experience is suck!
and i've been through that phase quite a number of time.
it hurts like hell.
especially the person who did that is actually the least person on earth you have doubt with or someone whom you have nearly 100% faith on that person.

and i just had that experience about 1 hour ago~

Please, my friend..
be transparent with me
though i may look stupid, i'm not that DENSE in detecting such obvious lie..
and for whatever reason, please be honest with me
i know, i'm not that important in your life,
but please...
i beg you.. for the sake of our friendship